Esalen Institute + Marfa, Texas
This month’s youtube companion episode was filmed during the Respect: Women's Podcast Festival in Philadelphia, where we performed in front of a live audience! We loved our time in Philly SO MUCH. Everyone with Respect was incredible, we got to explore the city and take in some sights (and food!)...we could go on or you could watch our 10 minute-ish Philadelphia recap video. If reading is more your style, or you left your headphones at home, read our blog post here.
Alison is obsessed with the kickboxing club she joined called 9 Round. It is a no-appointment-needed 30 minute workout with hot trainers. Lulu is obsessed with the $120 Philly cheesesteak we had at Barclay Prime. Yes you read that right. In episode 3 - "Truffled Cheese Whiz!"- Lulu "went" to Philadelphia and got this sandwich, never imagining she'd have the chance to do so in real life. Did she ever, and when you split it with 5 friends, it's not that expensive! And the split of champagne it comes with is not bad either!
While in the black-hole of Amazon browsing we all find ourselves in sometimes, Alison stumbled across this Blackhead Remover Pore Vacuum. It has different levels of suction to help get your pores clear and clean, and Alison really wants to try it. Be cautioned that a reviewer noted that on the highest level it can give you face hickies. Yikes! Lulu is wishing that her back wouldn't crack when she moved. Chiropractor? Collagen? If you have any other suggestions drop her a line!
Lulu is going to do a silent retreat at the Esalen Institute. Located in Big Sur, California, this spot has the aim of "pioneering change in self and society". So this will be much more than the weekends she just doesn't answer her phone and binges Netflix. Excited about the internal horizons this experience will broaden, Lulu is thinking either the “A Time To Reflect” workshop or Solstice Meditation Retreat, are what are she will sign up for. She stays in the Point House Plus, a private room which has a fireplace, a kitchenette, and a balcony overlooking the ocean. You can choose the least expensive sleeping option of a sleeping bag in a public area, but Lulu 1 - has $10,000 to spend, and 2 - is much more likely to be able to keep quiet the less she's around people. All of the meals are included, and there is even a bar! The NY times says the kitchen is famous for its bread, especially the sourdough rye, “which sits out all day and night along with apricot spread and peanut butter for snacking. This is not a health retreat.” Don't know about you, but a quasi-health retreat that gives you carbs and alcohol sounds like where we want to be.
If you aren't watching the video yet, this is where you are going to want to tune in. There is something called the Inner-Net class, where participants spend 10 minutes looking into a stranger’s eyes and silently repeating phrases like “this person has emotions just like me,” “this person has experienced pain and suffering just like me,” “this person will die just like me.” Alison gives examples of this to the live audience, with whom she feels deeply connected after this exercise. Especially that last one. Sheesh!
After her day of silently holding thoughts for people in her mind's eye, eating bread and drinking, it's time for an activity sure to tantalize. Night bathing is for those adventurous enough to swim in the nude in the ocean in the middle of the night. Sounds amazing, no? One with nature, naked as the day you were born? Except that is prime shark feeding time according to Alison, and while Lulu is going to brave the man-eaters, she is going for a little protection int he form of a skin-tone swimsuit from Net-A-Porter.
So back to this whole silent thing. It's a lot harder than it sounds to stay silent. There is a dad joke or bad pun in there somewhere. Lulu is going to get some "supplies" to keep her from making noise. A miniature whiteboard with markers should help her if there is something she absolutely needs to communicate, to start. After googling “best shoes to sneak around”, Lulu found these Chloe sneakers in “Quiet Brown”, so no awkward shoe squeaks in the middle of a mindfulness class.
“Best shoes to sneak around in”, "best way to keep someone quiet", and other such search terms lead Lulu to believes she is now on an FBI watchlist. Oh well, back to her shopping spree. She gets this Spiritual Gangster rainbow oversized sweatshirt so people can know she's "meditation-y" but also fun. She also got business cards from Hoban Cards so she can hand them to the people she is non-verbally meeting.
Knowing the emotional toll this weekend would likely take, and not wanting to ruin the environment with all the Kleenex she would likely go through, she gets six cotton handkerchiefs from Giovanni's Linens. She buys a Walden meditation cushion, just in case she wants to actually try meditating for long enough that a little cushioning would make her comfortable.
Perhaps most excited for this purchase, Lulu got the Sleephones Effortless heaband with built in bluetooth headphones so that she can listen to a binaural beats playlist. This may break the no-technology rule, but the benefits are on-theme, so she's breaking it. She also got an elliptical and extension cord so that she can work out on her balcony while listening to her binaural beats.
Needing to spend more money, Lulu types in "quiet" on Amazon, determined to buy anything and everything that pops up. The first result was A Quiet Place, which made the silent meditation retreat all of a sudden seem like a scary choice. "And now I have to prepare for war”, Lulu declares. She decided to brand this the "please don't kill me on my meditation retreat package", which equips you with leather straps with bells to hang on doors , a Louisville Slugger baseball bat for if sheer brute force is needed, and wasp spray, which is apparently much more effective then mace because it can project its spray up to 30 feet. Well, that certainly took a turn.
Alison googled - "What are the best badass women vacation spots in the world?" - as one does, and came up with Copenhagen, Denmark. But she's already been there in the episode We call this one: Drunk on Gregg’s Couch. So she went with option number two - Marfa, Texas!! According to thrillist.com “It’s a legit artists hub that draws good food and good people together under wide desert skies”. Alison is staying at El Cosmico, a spot in the Texan desert far from the hustle and bustle, that prides itself on being a place to disconnect. A "home" for hippies, nomads, wanderers, this place embodies the siesta lifestyle. Before she arrives, Alison wants to be properly outfitted, so she stops into their own store called El Cosmico Provisions Co., where she picks up a striped kimono robe, Heathermarie Heaton handmade leather moccasin boots, a Marfa Brand Handmade Soap Bar, and lastly a Coleman® Portable Camp Stove.
Alison discovers that they also sell patches! Think like the badges you earned in Girl Scouts or Boy Scouts...just a bit more grown up. Challenge accepted, she wants to earn all of the patches in one day!
El Cosmico has many different places you can stay - Trailers, Yurts, Tepees, Safari Tents or an actual building. Alison is going to stay in a Yurt, which has wood floors, A/C and heat, and a queen bed. Pretty luxurious, and it earned her the Yurt Badge (✓). She stays in the Yurt for her first night, then helped hung out with a tepee dweller (✓), took a tour through one of the safari tents (✓) and goes for a chat with a neighbor staying in one of the trailers (✓) whose going to offer her a little puff puff give (✓). She's already FIVE patches down! After getting to know her neighbors, she heads back to her Yurt where she has selected an add on of a dutchtub (✓), along with a six pack of Texan beer.
Alison starts her day at a coffee shop called frama connected to Tumbleweed Laundry. They are famous for their coffee and for their "Welcome To Marfa" mural populating Instagram. After her coffee and pastry, she heads into the laundromat to help a stranger fold their laundry, assembling a nice tower of clean clothes, which she feels earns her the building patch. (✓)
Next she heads to the Prada Store that’s actually not a store but a permanent art installation, with all the shoes and handbags from 2005 when it was "opened" in the window. To be clear, it was never a store, but rather a critique of consumerism by artists Elmgreen & Dragset. It's had some ups and downs in its nearly 15-year existence, and is now a popular tourist destination. If you don't go for a dose of the feels the artists intended, go for the selfie.
Next she's going hiking in Big Bend National Park. There are tons of trails through the mountains (mountain patch ✓), on which she manages to avoid a snake (✓), AND they allow smoking on the trails. After googling "how much does peyote cost", she plans to meet a stranger on the trails, buy some off of them, and then give them an extra $100 to stay with her and make sure she doesn't freak out. Peyote patch, nailed it. (✓)
For a little nosh, she heads to The Water Stop which according to Bon Appetit is “the second best reason to go to Marfa”. In addition to some insanely good sides, she gets the organic rotisserie chicken and rosé. Drinking patch, another one down. (✓)
Aiming to vibe with the Dolce Far Niente MO, Alison hunkers down for a nap in a hammock (✓). Now as a professional singer, Alison thinks her performance at Cosmic Karaoke should earn her the art badge. (✓) She then wants to head out for a nice dinner, but figures that the outdoor communal bathroom won't allow for her to prep for fine-dining, she books the Poolside Owner's Suite at Cíbolo Creek Ranch, just 40 minutes down the road, so she can get ready in style, and use the in-room sauna.
With the desert dust rinsed off, Alison heads to dinner at Cochineal, where she does the four course dinner with wine pairing. No trip to Marfa would be complete without a trip to see the Marfa Lights. And no, you don't have to have already earned the peyote patch to see them. The mysterious glowing orbs can be seen off of Highway 90. She earns a patch for taking in the phenomenon. (✓)
Back at the compound, Alison gets out some s'mores supplies and her camping stove, and making some for her and her neighbors surely earns her the cooking patch, right? (✓)
In a rush attempt to earn all her patches, she ends her evening with a hot guy in a cowboy hat teaching her to play his acoustic guitar (✓), while an owl (✓) hoots nearby, then before bed she jumps into her dutch tub, nipples (✓) out and feeling good!
She has only spent $3,000 at this point, so totally affordable, right? So she BUYS a Weltevree® dutchtub for a measly $4,695, and pays to have it shipped home.
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Speaker 1: 00:00 Hi everyone. Here's our latest episode and we actually recorded it a few months ago in Philadelphia at the respect women's podcast festival at amalgam comics. So thanks to respect, thank you to amalgam and thank you, especially to the Baes who you can hear laughing in the audience. If we come to your city, make sure you come see us live because it's a whole lot of fun. Here we go.
Speaker 2: 00:34 [Inaudible] [inaudible]
Speaker 3: 00:34 So I'm Lulu, I'm Alison and this is 10K Dollar Day. The comedy podcast about imaginary luxury travel every week. Don't have $10,000 zero. Not at all. It's totally fake. So every week what we do is we spend a fake $10,000 in a different city. You will hear how we do it. We're going to go through our obsessions, we are going to go through our wishlist, everything's going to be fun. Yeah. And she doesn't know where I've picked and I don't know where she's picked. Right. So that's where the comedy comes in. Okay. That's it. But we're so excited. We're not from Philly, we're from out of town. She lives in Tampa. I am in Orlando. Our producer Ash in the back is in Nashville and we have had so much fun here in Philly. We saw the Liberty bell, we did, we had a cheese steak.
Speaker 3: 01:17 Your Lyft drivers are very chatty. I am not used to that cause I live in New York. I now know several places to get cheese steaks and also how one guy's friend has a tumor. So that was way too much information for a Lyft ride. And it was a little odd and we're like, thanks, we're going to brunch. So it was awkward but it was fine. And it's beautiful. Your architecture, gorgeous buildings here. Large buildings, lots of carbs. Gorgeous buildings. We love Philly. Okay. So first for our listeners, because we know that they were going to release this as one of our episodes as well. This is going to be a video podcast. We do one of those every single month. It's a second podcast we do every second week of every month is a video companion. And we are here at the respect women's podcast festival in Philadelphia. Cheer that on. And we're at amalgam comics and coffee shop, cheer that on
Speaker 3: 02:16 And it's been so much fun. This is an amazing lineup. We just saw a first time I heard of Toya Haynes and I'm so jealous of her because all my life I've wanted to go like this and have music happen. Yeah. Like a soundtrack like that. She was like, Hey, can you play? And I've always had that and he also like read her mind. She'd be like, can you have an he already had it beat would drop. And what was that? I don't know. Magic. Magic. I enjoyed that. So jealousy. That's one of the emotions I have being here. That's good. You have anything you want to say about Philly? You want to go right into obsession? Oh, let's go right into obsessions. Okay. Yeah. What is your obsession? My current obsession this week is nine round. Do you guys have that here? When I around?
Speaker 1: 03:00 Okay. It's a boxing club that I joined. Okay. Well what? It's a it, it's a boxing club that I joined. You didn't tell me that you joined a boxing club? Oh yeah, I did. So it's called nine round. You walk in, there are nine rounds, right? Good name. Each round is three minutes and it takes 30 minutes to get through them. There is always a hot trainer there and you just make the rounds. You're in and out, you wear boxing gloves. I feel like I'm training to be like, eh, like Laura Croft tomb Raider or like S in some sort of superhero movies. So I feel like a badass and it's amazing. It's the hardest 30 minutes of my life. But it helps because there's other people there and so it feels like a competition. And then you wear a heart monitor and it's pretty,
Speaker 3: 03:45 Oh, I have to get [inaudible]
Speaker 1: 03:47 Points. And so at the end of the workout you see who has the most points and then it keeps track of your heart so that the, the guy knows, Oh, if you're in the blue, I got to work your harder. And if you're in the red, okay, why don't you take a break?
Speaker 3: 03:59 Hard pass. Why? Because this is how I work out. Please don't tell me what to do. Like, I can't handle it. And competition makes me go, let's just tell, share the points. Like I'm not, this is so not the way to motivate me. Yeah. But I don't do anything. If someone's not telling me what to do, I know I travel with you and I have to help make all the plans Tuesday. Anyways, that is my current obsession. I love that. What's yours? Okay, before you judge me know that we shared this experience with five other people and they're all here, which is amazing. Thanks for coming out bays. So a couple of days ago we went to have a cheese steak here in Philly. We went to Barclay prime. Has anyone had the cheese take a Barclay prime here at all? Okay guys. Yeah. Mom, you ever with me?
Speaker 3: 04:46 Thank you for raising your hand. She doesn't really understand how it works. Okay, so it's Wagyu beef. It is truffled cheese whiz. [inaudible] First of all, that's both fancy and not fancy at the same time. Just like us. It is flock raw moose [inaudible] right. And then they bake the roll over at park across the street and they bring it over. I mean it is fancy pants. Yeah. It comes with a half bottle of champagne. I'm trying to sell it before I tell them how much. Yes. Yeah, yeah. And you can get it at happy hour. So you can go with all of your friends, all of your friends split it because otherwise people will judge you because it's $120 for red cheese steak. You guys. Yeah, I mean I used my carbs on it. It was fine. It was fine. It was good and it was delicious.
Speaker 3: 05:36 I'm definitely go with people because it, we have like an inch each and it was enough. Yeah, totally enough, but delicious. It was delicious. But yeah, I take lots of people, take lots of people. That is my obsession. The $120 a Philly cheese steak. And the reason that it's so important to us is because back in January, 2018 we were on episode three and I picked Philadelphia and I picked that cheesecake and we were like, it'll never happen. Whatever. Have that. And then they were like, come to this podcast festival and we were like, we're saving our money and calling all our friends, we call it the four people we knew in Philly. And we're like, do you wanna meet us for the team? Bring your husband. We all split it. It was amazing. And I'm so glad we did it. So for us it was a huge like, yeah, a moment.
Speaker 3: 06:22 Yeah, it was good. Yeah. What is your wishlist this week? Okay, my wishlist. Don't judge me. But I found on Amazon there's this vacuum for your face. Wait, I'm not, I'm not kidding. And it takes off your blemishes and it has a, it has a dial that you go from one to five regarding on how much the suction, how much pile your car pass and you just stick it on and it like just sucks all of the badness out of your skin. Now a few of the reviews. Well first of all, all the reviews were pretty good, but one of them did say you have to be careful with the level because if you're on level five it gives you face hickies. Can you imagine if you're like, Oh my God, it's getting so much, and then you show up and someone's like, what happened to your face? Like I have a gross question suck on you or something. Why did you go to leprechaun? Because they're small and the hickeys are tiny.
Speaker 3: 07:16 No, the hickeys are tiny. They're like, they're like this big guys. It's not like a real mouth size. It's not like big. It's like tiny hickeys like a leprechaun. Why is no one with me on the head? Can I ask a question? Do you have to clean that thing out? Hi. Sorry. I don't know. I don't know. I haven't gotten it yet. You're not going to get it. I might get it. Okay. I think it's going to be, I think you will do it once, then you'll do it twice and then you will clean it out and you will never use that thing again. But isn't that the best part to be like, Whoa, look how much just I got out of my skin, like let me do that more. I don't know. I can't even handle like a B or strip like that's already took.
Speaker 3: 08:00 No, I like those too. Okay. Okay. So my wishlist? Yes. This is a visual is that when I went like this, when I go like this, that my back didn't crack cause I'm getting, as I get older I'm like, I'm like, Oh there it is. Oh there it is. Oh there it is. But it kind of feels like cracking knuckles now. So I feel like it can be like, Oh yeah. And it's like, wait, but you wish that didn't happen. I do what I do. Yeah, because it hurts. Oh yeah. I didn't hear that part. Well it's not comfortable. Okay. That's my wish. It's just that my back doesn't crack. I wish that your Mike would stay up. I did too. But it's, it's fine. It's okay. I'm just going to keep getting smaller, like a leprechaun. And then eventually I'll just give you hickies in the middle of the show seeing and then we'll come full circle and everyone will get it. We brought it around. [inaudible] Okay. Is it time for it? It's time for go 10 K day. Hey guys, thanks bays. I love that. Okay, so we do have, we have a Facebook page that's called 10 K bays. Yep. And C you asked for magic and magic happens. I put my hand out to the left. And so a few of our bays are here today. So Rachel, we're going to give you the honors. Who do you think should go first?
Speaker 3: 09:16 Yell it out. Hey. All right, here we go. So on my 10 K day, Allison's not going to believe I can do this. I'm going to do a silent retreat. What? Let me, can I at least just [inaudible] I'm already judging. I apologize. Okay. I'm going to do a silent retreat at the assailant or a solid Institute near big Sur California. Okay. So first I saw this and I was like, Sam retreat. I got it. I do this every night. I go home, I get in pajamas, I watched Netflix, I closed the door. I don't answer my phone. Silent retreat. Okay. This is no technology without me. Just live in silence. Oh, like a monk. Like a monk. Okay. That pays a lot of money. Okay. Yeah, so it's super fancy and I'm going to go to a time to reflect workshop or solstice meditation retreat.
Speaker 3: 10:12 Okay. Okay. I am not good at being silent guys, but I'm going to do this for the podcast imaginarily in my head. Okay. So I'm going to stay in the point house. Plus it has a separate bedroom. It has a kitchenette, it has a balcony overlooking the ocean. That's nice. Right? It includes all of your meals. There's also a bar. I don't understand how you can be silent at a bar, but maybe it's just like, maybe you'd just swipe. Maybe you just swipe. You just ordered like at Wawa. Oh yeah. It's just what you put your order in and then it, and then it comes out perfect. Okay. That for two nights, $3,180 for the weekend retreat. All right. Yet to be quiet. Right. All of your just [inaudible] and the audience was like, I can do that at home. Yeah. Yeah. But we're going to keep going.
Speaker 3: 10:58 If you wanted to do this on the budget level, you can get a sleeping bag in a public area for $605 for the weekend. But then in the morning you have to wrap up your sleeping bag because it's literally the living room of the hotel. What? So you sleep in a public area? Yeah, in a sleeping bag. You pay for them. Well, yeah. Yeah. Well guys, I don't know who does it, but apparently a lot of people cause they're like, I don't want the balcony overlooking the ocean. I just want to be quiet in a public [inaudible] even as you say, it sounds ridiculous. I think they were trying to make it accessible and instead it just sounds like camping mom. My mother just went stupid. Okay. Well there was that, there was an article in the New York times that says that the kitchen is famous for its bread because there was a guy who was a chef at Google who quit his job to become the Google at this meditation resort because most of their clientele are all from the it world after everything crashed.
Speaker 3: 12:04 I mean that's fascinating. Right? So they work in technology, they're in technology all day long and they're like, I just got turn off and then go pay $3,000 to not talk to anybody. Interesting. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So the chef is great. He makes sourdough rye. It's out all day and night. They have like this free buffet and then it says in the New York times, this is not a health retreat. So that got it. Well if you can't talk. Yeah. Are you ready? Okay. So this is from the article. This is going to make some of you as super excited to go and it's going to make most of you not, this is what the article says upstairs. They had a class called the inner net for the it people. So instead of the internet, it was the internet. Oh, I get it. The internet class was doing a compassion exercise.
Speaker 3: 12:51 Everyone spent 10 minutes looking into a stranger's eyes and silently silently repeating phrases. Let's think about that. That there is someone who is administering the class who's like, everyone's silently repeat after me. How do you even, you can't even say silently repeat after me. And it doesn't have to think it's kind of strange cause it's right. Every teacher that listens to this is going to get really excited. But basically the administrator of the class can speak and none of the students can talk. Oh I got it. It's not a you are you a teacher? Oh that's heaven. Yeah, exactly right. Wait, are there like consequences? Yeah. You have to sleep in the sleeping bag. Oh that's it. They downgrade you. Yeah. So these are great. These are the phrases they had to silently repeat while staring into a stranger side. So does she say it out loud and then they, and they think it this, they think it. They think in their eyes. I think that silently, right? The way you say it and I'm going to do the eyes. These, I'm going to give you the exact three phrases that are in the New York time. Got it. I'm going to let my guys with different people make different people uncomfortable every time. Okay. Okay. This person has emotions just like me.
Speaker 3: 13:59 Number two. Okay. Maybe not. This person has experienced pain and suffering. Just like me. Number three. Okay. This person will die just like me. That was it. Good. That was good, right? Yeah. Oh God. It's crazy how connected I feel to you right now. Okay. Just went through it. Oh, okay. Yeah. Right. I can't wait to be here for the first NA girl. Respect. Let's all silently talk to each other festival. That's going to happen in October. Okay. Oh, so one of the things you can do with this retreat besides silently stare into each other's eyes and she's like a bad improv exercise is night bathing. This is all for Alison burns. Oh, okay. You pay an extra 35 bucks [inaudible] from 1:00 AM to 3:00 AM you go and all swim together in the ocean. Okay. And almost everyone is naked. Okay. I like the naked part.
Speaker 3: 15:07 I know, but that is prime shark feeding time. Oh, are you sure? Yeah. Do you have facts behind that? I mean, shark week, right? Nighttime. That's when they like, yeah. I don't know. And then night and then whatever's not dusk. What's the next part, Dawn. Thank you. I know that. Okay, so I'm going to go near the naked swimming. Oh, come on. You know, that's not my thing. Now, Hey, I don't like oceans. Sharks live there. It's their home. If they want to bite me, that's totally a prerogative. Sorry. number two, I don't want to be around a bunch of weird people who I've just said, this person's going to die just like me naked. Oh yeah. That's a lot of vulnerability for a weekend. Right? But I am going to buy a swimsuit, the color of my skin, so it's like I'm naked, but I'm not really making, I like that because that's how open to vulnerability I really am.
Speaker 3: 16:07 I like to just pretend I'm naked, but not really. Okay. I got it at Net-a-Porter, [inaudible] dot com it is $420 wow. So, so far I've spent, right. Remember the point is to get to 10,000 yeah. Okay. So I spent 31 80 on the house or in the place, $35 to go night bathing. 420 on the swimsuit. And I was like, Ugh, how do I spend more money? Okay. I realized I need tools to be silent. You need tools to be silent. Here we go. Oh, I just, I had an idea of what I would use to be silent. What would tape tape? Oh, that's dark. Like just have willpower. That was, Oh wait, I just need everyone to picture that class of people repeating. This person will die just like me with duct tape over their mouth because that is a completely different retreat. Yeah.
Speaker 3: 16:59 I was going more for whiteboard. Right. I got it. Yeah. Okay. So I got a mini whiteboard and six markers from amazon.com 14 bucks. Easy. I looked up best shoes to sneak around in. Okay. And I found sneakers by Chloe in the color is called quiet Brown. Oh that's smart. Cause can you imagine if everyone asked to be quiet and all you hear is brick like you had really squeaky shoes. Exactly. Fun. Those shoes. 850 bucks. Whoa. I know on Amazon at Nordstrom. And then I realized that I was Googling best shoes to sneak around. Best silence shoes. Best way to keep somebody quiet. And then I was like, the FBI is gonna monitor my browsing history. Yeah, this is dangerous. So I had to kind of like mix it up a little. So I got a oversized sweatshirt that says spiritual gangster. Oh I like that.
Speaker 3: 17:53 Yeah. I felt like that's kind of meditation retreaty but still like me. And then I got business cards. Oh that sweatshirt. $108 Oh, full Respimat shirt. Okay. Then I got business cards so that I can hand them to people as I meet people that say your name. Yeah. Yeah. Well see you're gonna introduce yourself to people. Sign language. What if everybody doesn't know sign language? I mean the letters of the alphabet. I mean you're L U L U, this is not you in sign language remotely at all. So don't think it. She's, I mean she's going to be like, my name is Al [inaudible] son. I don't understand why they can't figure out my name. I don't know. So I got business cards from Haven cards. [inaudible] Cards, $200. Beautiful. [inaudible] splurge, none of that Vista print for me. All right. And then I realized I was going to cry a lot.
Speaker 3: 18:55 Why? Because people are looking into my eyes and telling me like emotional things with their mind. Right? Okay. And so I also want it to be ecofriendly because it's California. Okay. So instead of Kleenex, I got handkerchiefs, like old school hand gotchas, you and I got them at Giovanni's linens. Okay. Six cotton handkerchiefs will cost you $150. Wow. That's a small niche market. Now your guys. But I think I kind of want to be a handkerchief person in real life. Oh really? I think so. I'm doing this research cause I like that you don't have to throw it away. Yeah, I like that they're cotton. And I cry at the movies all the time. Okay. It's the only time he ever cried at a movie. Yeah. And I feel like a little Dabby dab. Yeah. Little Debbie dab will do posh. Okay. Then I bought a meditation cushion.
Speaker 3: 19:43 Okay. Because I typed in meditation accessories and that's what came up and I dunno what you need it for, but I bought it. It's 190, $95. They're big or small. It's bigger than your butt. Okay. But smaller than an auto man. Bigger than your, but smaller than you kneel on it. I think you sit on it, sit on it. Ashwood, no Ash, what happens? What happens with a meditation cushion? You just sit on it. Why do you need it so your butt doesn't fall asleep? Yeah. Six hours. If you're meditating for six hours, I fall asleep. It would turn into my pillow. Just run cheers episodes in my head for like hours that I would be all the way to Kirstie alley being in the show if that happened to me. Okay. So that came with a mat and a toe that was 200 bucks.
Speaker 3: 20:34 Okay. Oh, you're gonna want this. Are you ready? Yeah. Then I got the sleep phones. Do you know if this is like your pods? Oh no. Oh, what is it? This is at a headband that you can wash. So it's like fleece or breeze breezes, breathable. Fleeces flexible. You wear it around your head like a little, like a little headband, whatever. And it has Bluetooth little Bluetooth speakers in them that play your little music while you sleep and it also keeps your head and you don't feel that the pods at all. Yeah. So I got those. You can have them too. For 150 bucks. And I going to listen to a binaural beats playlist on Spotify. What does that mean? Okay. I'm going to describe this in a way that I just, I just scanned it, but what I believe this is gonna be so wrong, is that they play one tone in one ear and one tone in the other, and then your brain fills in the third and that puts you to sleep.
Speaker 3: 21:35 What if your brain doesn't know how to fill in the third? I don't think you have to teach it. I think it's like a thing that our brains do. That's amazing. Yeah. Like an over tone but in your head. Ah, right. Okay. I still don't get it, but yeah, that's because I don't really have any facts behind that, but it's supposed to be great for meditation. Awesome. Okay. So I'm at the meditation retreat. I'm in the room. You have to picture this, right? I've got the room with the balcony, the fireplace and things. I'm in California, I've got my stuff. Everything's great. What do you do when you're silent and listening to good beats? I love to be on the elliptical. That's like, Oh, okay. So I bought an elliptical, but I put it outside and most of you are going to be like, why don't you just run outside?
Speaker 3: 22:13 Cause I don't like to I like being inside, but it's going to be outside and because I like to be able to go with the beat of what I'm doing and it's easier on the elliptical than it is like in real life. So you can be like, Oh, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And they can be like, Oh yeah, you know what I'm at. So dramatic. I love it was, there's a lot of emotions in my head as I, as I'm running. It's okay. I understood. I caught an elliptical.
Speaker 3: 22:42 See, I didn't even have to say anything. No, I got it. Yeah. Great. Okay, so a pre-core energy series, elliptical cross trainer. You can get it on Amazon. 3000 bucks. That's a cheaper one. PS, that's a refurb. You had that much left. Yeah, because I have, all I've done is like buy handkerchiefs and all. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. And then I had to get a hundred foot outdoor extension cord because it's outside. Yeah, that's cheap. It's only 25 bucks on Amazon, Facebook, Amazon, Amazon basics. Alrighty. Okay. At this point I'm like, I need more. I need more. I need to spend more money. What am I going to do? So on Amazon, I searched quiet like, what's going to come up if I search quiet? And the first thing that came up was a DVD of the movie, a quiet place. Good one. And then I realized that now the meditation retreat sounds like the scariest thing I've ever been to and now I have to prepare for war.
Speaker 3: 23:42 So just in case like yeah, sound right. So I got hanging doorbells on a leather strap like for dogs. So like if someone comes in you can hear it. I put them on every, every door in the rotation. March. That's smart. Cause what if something happens? You can't yell. That's what I'm saying. You can't look at a monster and be like, I know like think of him go away. Yeah, exactly. So I had to put the bells out. Okay. And then I got a Louisville Slugger because Carrie Underwood taught me that that's how you express emotion. So I got a Louisville Slugger and I'm going to hide it somewhere. The hanging doorbells were $35 and 80 cents. Okay. Do you know how much a Louisville Slugger is? Do you have to be $100 Oh really high. Jaak 400 Oh, you guys keep it a hundred. Keep it a $1,000. $1,200 $1,500 99 cents. Oh my God. Oh, crazy. 1600 bucks for a Louisville Slugger. And then to complete my, please don't kill me. And my meditation retreat package, I got something that a cop told me to get. Okay. Wasp spray wast. Yeah. So it's like mace. Yeah, but, but stronger and, and it goes farther and it goes farther. You didn't have to say it. I just knew it.
Speaker 3: 25:07 That's how it works. That's how it works. So my apartment was broken into like 10 or 12 years ago or something, and the cop said, you should keep wasp spray by your bed because you can, you can reach a person. Like it goes so far, it can go up to 27 feet. So he said, forget mace, carry wasp spray. How about that? You're welcome. That's amazing. All right, cool. Yeah, so now I am ready. Remember all my meals were taken care of by the Google chef who's now living his life at this retreat. Love it. And that brings my total, it's not junk. My total is $9,973 and 67 cents. $10,000 I got close. I know you're really excited about your day.
Speaker 3: 26:00 Are you ready? Oh wow. Okay. So how does it say that yet? So my day, I've been living in an Airbnb together for like two days and I don't know where these clipboards. I know, I know. Told you I had props. Okay. All right. So where are we right now? 15 what? 1515 what minutes? No, where are we physically right now? Philadelphia. Thanks. And where are we? Philadelphia. And like where are we? Gosh, amalgam, coffee and cotton. Who are we with our people here at respect. I don't know what [inaudible]. Okay, great. Great, great. So what I was thinking of when I was like, okay, what day do I want to do with a bunch of badass women? So I Googled what are the best badass women vacation spots in the world? Okay.
Speaker 1: 26:44 Question Mark and the first one we've already done because obviously I know where bad ass women go. And that was Copenhagen, Denmark episode 46, entitled we call this one drunk on Greg's couch. You should all check it out. The second place. Here we go. I'm going to Marfa, Texas. That's where to go with your badass women. Yeah. Yeah. Can you believe it? No, I know. Okay. So thrillist.com says it's a legit artist hub that draws good food and good people together under wide desert skies. Sounds amazing. Have you been, you keep shaking your head. You know what it is. Okay. So cause she's a bad ass woman. All right. So I'm going to stay at El Cosmico. Okay. And this place is amazing. But before we get there, before I tell you about it, first I have to buy some kind of artsy hippy clothing cause I want to fit in, right?
Speaker 1: 27:37 They actually have their own clothing and accessories, camping gear line called provisions. I'm getting the El Cosmico Komono robe for $180. I'm getting the handmade dyed leather moccasins. Okay. Okay for one 95 I'm giving some soap. $12. Okay. I'm getting a portable camp stove. I need it. I need a stove in a minute. Are you cooking your own food? We're getting there. That stove is one 40. Okay. And here's what's the best part. Okay. I found out in this store they sell patches like girl scout patches. Okay. Okay. And you're supposed to collect these patches. So challenge accepted. Okay. here's the list of patches and you're going to help me with this. Yup. Look, Lulus clipboard. Okay, so wait. Oh, can I look at it? Yes. Yeah. Oh, all right. Okay. So here's the patches. We have a cooking patch, lights, owl, TP smoking. See that guy's drinking trailer art, mountains.
Speaker 1: 28:44 Payoti nipple. Get ready for it. Hammock, Safari, tent snake, Dutch tub building. Yurts and acoustic guitar. So these are all, there's 18 patches. Okay, so here we go. Anytime that I get a patch, you're gonna check it off. This is real. This is real. Okay. Yeah, I'm ready. Real research. Imaginary travel. This is like, bingo. Welcome for podcast. All right. All right. So as soon as I will yell it out and you just do it. Oh, I'm ready. Alright, so first they have many different places you can stay. They have trailers. Don't do this yet. Trailers. Yurts teepees, Safari tents. They do self camping. You can also stay in a building, which is probably what you'd want to do, but I'm going to stay in a yurt. Okay. This is a circular tent. Yes. We know this. Yup. Alright, so there's a queen bed. There's wood floors.
Speaker 1: 29:27 So this is like glamping. Okay. Cross off yurt. But they do have AC. Oh, see you'd like it. I'd like that. All right, so cross off that your batch. I'm only okay. So I'm only going to stay the one in the year because I'm going to help someone else set up their teepee and and we're, I'm going to hang out with them on the second night. And then in the meantime I'm going to walk around the camp grounds and I'm going to take a tour through one of the Safari tent Safari tent, and then I'm going to have a chat with one of the neighbors that are staying in the trailer. You kind of put this in order and then the person in the trailer, they're going to give me a little puff. Puff. Give Oh smoking. Huh. Got it. Boom.
Speaker 1: 30:10 All those patches are already completed, right? I haven't even spent a dollar. All right. So the year is only $120 a night, but you can enhance your stay. Okay. So I'm also enhancing it by getting a bucket of six cold Texas beers upon arrival of nine and a private Dutch tub outside of my yurt. What makes a tub Dutch? It's you like the fire underneath it for real. So that it, yeah. Yeah, babe. It's a big Dutch tub. Right. Made out of like stone. And you like the fire and the water and that's what, yeah, right. I'm right. Yeah. That sounds like you're being cooked. That sounds like you're making body soup. Well, I mean basically that's what you do in Babs nurse doing in your own. Oh, I've lost them. Alright. So I'm going to wake up in the morning and I'm going to take Uber's all day to where I'm going.
Speaker 1: 31:06 I'm guessing I'm going to spend about $215 on that. Oh. And my enhanced stay since I've got the extra things was four 80 for the two nights. Okay. Still guys pretty affordable. All right. So they have a coffee shop nearby called tumbleweed laundry. Oh, you guessed it. It's a laundromat and a coffee shop. Okay. And people brag about this place. Like how cool laundry? No, about the coffee. Nice. Cause if you spill something on yourself you can just wash it right there. I'm sure that's how it was created. Okay. Okay. So about $15 on coffee. Yeah. And like, I don't know a croissant now. What I thought was how nice would it be if I traveled over to the laundromat and help someone fold their laundry and I would create a tower of clothes, obviously earning me the building patch. That's a stretch. But it works. Okay. Question. Yes. The Dutch top count as the cooking patch.
Speaker 1: 32:13 I mean I didn't think of it that way, but okay. I put you in charge, so there you go. Okay. Alright, so I'm going to see a few of the sites there. Did you guys know they have a Prada store that was never actually a store? It's called the Prada non store. It was an art installation that has in the windows. It's this little tiny building and it has shoes and handbags from 2005 and it just sits there. Yeah, I know. And you just go take pictures with it. So I'm going to go see that. But that's free. And then I'm going to go hiking through the mountains. Got it, got it, got it. Got it. Yeah. Big bend national park. And they allow smoking on the trails. And I'm guessing that somebody's, you know, going through those trails, they're going to have some pod on them, right?
Speaker 1: 32:58 I mean they're, they got to assuming. So I didn't know how much payoti cost. So I Googled how much does pod cost on the street? Question. Our loves our Google searches. You haven't been able to tell and it's about $30 peyote. Well for like a gram, but what's the real cost? Oh, I don't know. It just, I mean that's what, Oh, I get it. I got it. Like your brain on drugs. You okay? I got it. I got it. So because it's $30, I'm going to see somebody on the trails and I think you do smoke it. Do you smoke pot? Don't answer. You don't have to answer that. So I'm going to offer the person on the trail $130 to let me smoke it and to watch me in case I freak out. Oh, so just stay with me. Yeah. Spot or pod.
Speaker 1: 33:45 Spotter. Spotter. That's, so that's peyote. You cross off IOT stuff. All right. So then I don't know if pod makes you hungry, but I'm guessing it does, right? Cause don't, nevermind you basing it on other things. I don't know what you're talking about. All right, so I'm going to go to the waterhole. Okay. And bone appetit.com says it's the second best reason to go to Marfa. The watering hole. Okay. It's open every day at 11 and they don't close until they sell out of everything they made that day. That's kind of cool, right? Yeah. For them. Oh, well if you get there late then, you know. Yeah. All right. So I'm gonna get the organic rotisserie rotisserie. Don't have to do it again. No, you know what I meant? Just say it again. Don't you know what I meant? They know what I meant.
Speaker 1: 34:36 Silently repeating the correct pronunciation in our head. So I feel you should just say it out loud yet. I got the chicken, took the whole chicken $28, but I'm going to offer them an additional 15 to cut it off the bone. Cause I don't do, I don't do that. It freaks me out. I can't mm. Freaks me out. But I love chicken. I just don't, I need you to take it off the bone for me. I'm going to get the biscuits and gravy with fried eggs. Oh, $11. I'm going to get the jalapeno Mac and cheese. Delicious. $7 and best part rosé on tap. Oh, drinking check. Yeah. Oh yeah, that's it. Got it. Yeah. Okay. So I'm gonna get hree glasses of the rosy. So total I'm spending inety eight dollars at the watering hole. Okay. Oh, I forgot. Oh, when I was going through the mountains, I saw a snake do.
Speaker 1: 35:26 Seriously, are you kidding? No. Snake patch. Alright. Back. All right. That was a little, okay, so now I'm going to go. Okay. I just wait. Can I tell everyone that what we have left is owl light's hammock, acoustic guitar and nipple. So let's just all stay tuned. All right. Okay. All right. So then I'm going to go back to the year. I'm going to relax for a bit and take a nap in a hammock hammock. [inaudible]. Then that night at ix PM they have cosmic karaoke. Okay. Acoustic atone? No, no, no. What arts? Oh, I do click off art because you went to a product installation. Oh, okay. Okay. So then I wanted to do a true en K dinner, but I realized that I was sharing an outhouse with lots of people and like, how do you get ready during an outhouse? Did I skip that part?
Speaker 1: 36:17 Oh yeah. Yeah, you did. There's not share a bathroom. There's, there's not enough pod in the world to like make me do that. But go ahead. So I decided that I need to find a place to get ready. So I did a little research. I found the, I don't know how to pronounce this. SIBO. Cibolo SIBO. C has a little above the eye. An accent [inaudible]. Okay. The Creek ranch where luxury meets Southern hospitality and Oh, did you know what the SIBO means in Spanish? What? Buffalo. Cool. Right. Okay. All right. So I'm going to go get the nicest sweet. I'm going to pay for it for ne night. Welve hundred dollars. Oh yes. I'm gonna spend in addition to your year. Yeah. Cause I just need to get ready to dress. I'm taking a jacuzzi bath on a shower, whole ine yards. Then I'm going to go have dinner.
Speaker 1: 37:03 How you say this word? Cock. Caneel. Kaka Neil. That's where we're going. Really? It's, it's this, right? Like a spiral shape. I dunno. It's a dinner place. Okay. Alright. Okay. Well they have their own garden. How cool is that? So a lot of their like herbs and spices and vegetables come from their own garden. I'm doing the our course tasting menu with dessert and wine pairing, ahundred and sixty dollars. Okay. Then after that, I'm going to see the Marfa lights. These lights are these little orbs that appear in the desert outside of the exas town and they're like the size of basketballs. And they were like different colors. It's like this phenomenon. Yes. Size of basketball. And they just like float through the air and you can go see them. Not crazy. Okay. So they twinkle, they merge, they do all these things. It's great. Okay, so you got the lights.
Speaker 1: 37:56 Cool. All right. We're going back to the yurt. I'm going to get out my portable stove and I'm an a cook. Nope. You had the bath. Oh, I'm going to make some smores and while I'm sitting there, an owl is going to hoot owl is who is hot guy in a cowboy hat. It's going to teach me how to play as acoustic guitar. There it is. And just before bed I'm going to take off all my clothes and take a hot bath and my Dutch tub, my nipples are out and I'm feeling good. Okay. So those patches ahundred and eighty dollars only brings my total to hree thousand dollars in 3m around hree thousand okay. In some sense, but don't worry, I found out that the same place I bought my hippy clothes, they sell Dutch tubs. Oh, the cooking
Speaker 3: 38:36 Top. The big old cooking tub. And they will ship it to you for ix thousand nine hundred ninety five dollars which brings my total to en thousand jobs.
Speaker 2: 38:52 Alright. Real quick, real quick.
Speaker 3: 38:53 A lot of time, huh? Okay guys, irst of all, we're stressed out. We've never had a time limit before. We always just edit down. Okay. So we have hree minutes. We always talk about a charity in the place that we go. Yeah. So I would give my en thousand dollars to the place that I was talking about. It's actually a nonprofit, which is part of the reason you can go there and pay ixty bucks and sleep in a sleeping bag. A, again, it's called a silent, it'll be on our blog. We do our show notes on our blog with links and everything there. Amazon affiliate links, hint, hint. So you can see those. And I would give it to a salad and I would give it to the Judd foundations. It's a, their slogan is ideas for people, shelter for art. And what I love about it is they provide spaces for artists to come and create at no cost to them.
Speaker 3: 39:32 So look that up. Yup. Jed Fung, oundation dot org. I love that. Yeah. okay. So we always end with happies and it's really simple. It can be something big, AB, something small, whatever it is. We just love to know what it is. So Alison burns, what is your, my happy is being here at respect with some amazing people and just the fact that we get to connect and share stories and be together. I should have, I should've had you go laugh cause you're just so much nicer than mine. What's your happy that we went to brunch today and there was a table that opened up right as I got hair goals. Like we ordered our food and we walked outside and someone was standing up. It's a nice styling moment. And I was like, Whoa. And then guys next to us were like, they just left. And we're like, thank you.
Speaker 3: 40:16 It was good. That was my happy. All right guys. Thank you so much. Yeah, we are en K dollar a day. Now we do we end our podcast the same way every week. We want you to help us out. That's true. But irst I'm going to tell you that en K dollar days produced by Ash burns music is by Stan Collins, graphic artists by Jacob McCallister. Our en K Saturday voiceover is by Charlie Hume. Thanks to Buzzsprout for being an amazing hosting service. Special thanks to the respect women's podcast festival. Thanks to amalgam comics and coffee house here in Philly. And now we end our podcasts the same way every week. So we say with friends like us, and you're going to yell out who needs amenities. Yeah. Alright, here we go. With friends like us, who needs amenities!